Pub crawl bus operators urged to cut the noise

Wednesday December 21, 2016 Published in Smoke Signals

“DEAR PUB CRAWL bus owners and operators,” a smoke signaller writes.

Please be more considerate when driving through our village that your music does not contain obscene language and that your clients aren’t screaming profanities and that the volume of your sound system, in particular the bass, is not at a through-the-roof volume. I’m tired of my children waking up when the party bus stops to pick up clients.” 

PROMO TEXT ON SUNDAYS

WHAT DO BLUESKY think they are doing, being greedy and thirsty for money and sending promo text on a Sunday when phone owners such as myself are in church. These constant promotions are a nuisance. No respect at all.

FEELING BLUE ABOUT PHONE DATA

“HERE IS THE latest I have received in an endless barrage of text messages from Bluesky,” a smoke signaller says. ‘DOUBLE YOUR DATA! - Purchase our 3DAY$5 to get 400mb. Promo starts NOW & ends 20DEC16 @ 11.59pm. Data expires 3 days from purchase. Call *888# and get your new data pack NOW’. What is the point of having data that only lasts for three days? They should offer data specials that last 30 days or roll unused monthly data over. Ripoff merchants!

CARTOON SUGGESTION

THE NEXT KATA cartoon about the Nikao School mess could involve the same little girl asking the minita, “Why did you tear down my classroom when there was no money to build a new one?’ The minita could reply, “We wanted to make sure that we commenced building in an election year. Even if it takes a TMV-like construction duration to complete it! We’ll just roll it from one election year to another…four years ought to do it.”

LAW SHOULD RETURN TO PARLIAMENT

IS IT ANY wonder that the police don’t stop helmet-less riders on motor bikes? Should they stop everyone they think is between 16 and 25, just in case? Is this one of those laws that needs to go back to parliament and have some common sense added to it? Either everyone wears a helmet - even pillion passengers and cyclists, or none at all. But good luck finding a helmet that will fit the pareu “safety harness” passengers in the under-six age group.

IT’S WAR OUT WEST!

GOODNESS ME. AN unseemly row appears to be developing between a group of gentle Hawaiians on Rarotonga and the owner of a certain resort out west. Word is that a respected musician who had been performing at this resort forever, got the boot recently purely because he is a friend of the resort’s former owner, one of the island’s true characters. The former owner recently starred in a large and very well written feature story in the New Zealand Herald. Now copies of the story, complete with colour photos, are being circulated around the island, threatening to ignite open warfare between the Hawaiians and the resort’s current owner. Who will be next to get the boot? Watch this space for the latest developments!

 

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