GEORGE MAGGIE FAN
George Maggie will be the next PM of the Cook Islands, a smoke signaller says. “In my opinion, people should be proud of George and I think he will double the number of votes in the next election. All of the critics should keep quiet and support him. We need people like him, Teariki Heather, Tim Tepaki and Smiley Heather in our parliament.”
CAPTURING THE AIRWAVES
Large Christian warrior takes control of national radio station! Singlehandedly enforces return to Maori language and music only. Provides Christian prayer and guidance for the great unwashed, plus undisputed sports and political news (not fake) from his two Generals, George and George chuckles. Local tribal leaders are reportedly very happy with return to pre-Poobah customs. The other George Tupapa says he’s very sorry he didn’t think of this first.
Second news flash: The immigration department is wondering why people under 30 are leaving the country in ever-greater numbers. It’s almost a flood they say. When questioned, a government spokesperson said, “Don’t worry, we are going to put a stop to that very soon.”
Wilkie Rasmussen is not even an MP let alone Minister of Foreign Affairs, so why are we reading all the hogwash from him? Because it’s election year and he is desperate to win Penrhyn. I reckon he can’t beat Willie John, and young Tapaitau is chasing both of them. Time for Wilkie to retire and stop causing chaos in the Democratic Party.
I roughly calculate that if our esteemed leaders applied the same taxation logic to reduce sugar intake as they do to nicotine addiction, then a 1.5 litre bottle of sweetened fizzy drink (no brand names – don’t want to get sued), should retail at around $25. I guess there aren’t as many sugar Nazis as there are smoking Nazis. Or should that be voters? Mmmm.
ALL NOT WELL WITH OCI
It seems is not well in the One Cook Islands camp. It was bad enough having one convicted criminal, the proud arsonist Tupapa MP George “Maggie” Angene, who burnt down the old courthouse which resulted in the loss of irreplaceable land ducuments, but now that there’s two of them, what does the future hold? With two criminals in the “movement” now, should we be surprised that Aitutaki MP Pumati Pumati wants to fly the coop, amid rumours his leader’s brother will stand in this year’s general election? Why didn’t he stand in the last by-election? Where’s the loyalty to Pumati, elected by Demo/OCI supporters?
OFF TO THE CIP
Pumati’s not going to the Demos who helped to elect him, but to the CIPs! So, the Demo and OCI supporters who voted him in should tell the OCI leader to leave their man alone, it’s called loyalty! So what do they do now? Has the PM offered to fatten up our little pigeon and offer him a gift, similar to the one Albert Nicholas received a few years back? And Mona Ioane, what’s his lot? It seems he’s
become a threat to Puna and a liability to the CIP. So will he become the sacrificial lamb?
POACHING IN MIND?
With OCI in disarray and imploding, would they stoop to poaching to rebuild their party? Will Demo MP Selina Napa consider an OCI leadership role, with Demo MP Tamaiva Tuavera as her deputy? And what about Matavera’s aspiring Demo candidate, Vaitoti Tupa? Will he decide to join George Pitt’s bunch? And are these people associating with Pitt who seems bent on destroying the Demo Party? There are some questions that need urgent answers.