Less haste please!

Wednesday February 15, 2017 Published in Smoke Signals
Less haste please!

“To the lady I spotted driving through Tupapa on Monday morning, please slow down,” a smoke signaller says.

You have a personalised number plate. You are living in paradise. What is your rush? The poor car in front of you that you nearly rear-ended would not have been a “sponge” to hit, but more likely as hard as a brick wall. What’s with the speed you were driving and no seat belt, there could have been some nasty injuries.

SILLY HELMET RULE

“And on the subject of driving, another smoke signaller says the safety helmet law is looking increasingly silly and impossible to police. “Every day you see young people driving around without helmets and the police seem to turn a blind eye. Perhaps tourists are easier meat.”

DEPORTATION FOR ALL

“The Cook Islands are wanting to deport a New Zealand citizen but Cook Islanders can come to New Zealand without the fear of being deported – even if they have been convicted of crimes,” a smoke signaller says. “I think it’s time for Cook Islanders to forgo their New Zealand passports and have their own Cook Islands passport. But wait! They won’t, as they get free medicals, can go on the dole and can enter Australia easily, as well as picking up a number of freebies along the way. New Zealand needs to wake up and deport these people, just like they do in the Cook Islands.”

EXPENSIVE VISIT

A league enthusiast reckons a trip to Aitutaki is way too expensive for a league team. “It’s almost eight grand – just for an overnight visit.

TRICKY BILLING

Bluesky is up to their tricks again.  Perhaps profits aren’t high enough. Check your January Bluesky bill. They have now billed you for calls in November and December last year that they “forgot” to bill you for – yeah right!

STAN’S STILL THE MAN

“Stanley the Wright man for the job,” cryptic smoke signaller says.

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